Tuesday, October 7, 2014

Client Relations

To all of the people who think I should be available to them 24/7: We live in a big city with a hundred and one great emergency clinics. They exist so I don't have to be on-call all the time. I deserve to have a weekend with my family without thinking about or talking to you crazy people.

To all of the people who think I am just trying to sell you flea meds to make a buck: Your dog/cat has fleas, and/or flea allergy. Taking one pill is not going to solve your problem. Don't get mad at me when in 2 months you are back in here with skin infections having to pay me $300 all over again. I tried to help you stay away.

To all of the people who think that it is their right to own a pet, but not their responsibility to pay for it: You are what is wrong in this country. Stop blaming everyone else for your problems and asking everyone else to pay for your mistakes. Take responsibility for your pets, children, bills, house, car, whatever. You will be happier for it.

To all of the people who have somewhere else to be: It is not my fault nor my responsibility to get you to your next appointment on time. You are lucky we squeezed you in on a busy Saturday. If you don't want to wait, come in during the week. You might get out of here a little sooner if you put down your phone and listened to what I had to say the first time, instead of making me repeat it because you weren't paying attention.

To all of the people who just can't afford it right now, but will come back next month: You're not fooling anybody. We've been talking about that dental for 2 years. Do you really think I believe you're going to schedule it next month?

To all of the people who have a mean dog but refuse to acknowledge or curb it's bad behavior and tell her Good Girl as she's trying to bite my face off, or say She never bites! or get offended when I muzzle her: Fuck you. You're an asshole, and its clear where your dog got it from.



Now,
To all of the people who take care of their pets' needs and without holding a grudge about the cost: Thank you, you make my job a little easier.

To all of the people who listen to what I tell them and try to follow instructions: Thank you, you make me feel like something is going right.

To all of the people who ask me before asking Dr. Google: Thank you, you just saved both of us a big headache.

To all of the people who thank me for saving their pet's life or helping them to the next: Thank you, thank you, thank you.